How to be Catholic without being a virgin.  Cranberry juice for a bladder infection, but go to the clinic just in case.  Nothing like chlamydia to kill a romance.  This black eye’s the reason I called in sick yesterday…how does it look today?  I’m learning how to Step, Step, Step.  What are the best shoes for running?  Sports bras, you gotta protect ‘em while you got ‘em.  If you’re on top, your face looks fatter.  Watch them, watch them, watch those Black ladies fingering the spandex.  May I help you find something?  (Women can teach women racism.)  The cinnamon rolls they sell downstairs make you gain weight just by looking.  Glasses make you look stupid.  A little make-up goes a long way.

            

Copyright © Maria Melendez, 2005. All Rights Reserved.